*whatever*

Suddenly everything seems so different to me.. Feeling very lost right now.. As if nothing is going right in my life. One moment I thought I have got the best bf, then it appears that I didn't.. One moment I thought I couldn't tell anyone about it, then she appears to be there for me.. Why is it when I choose to be honest and nice, he chooses to do things exactly the opposite way..? Why is this not a really big issue and yet I feel so painful inside? I was all ready to let myself enjoy our three years together on monday.. Not ready now of course.. Definitely not. Feel an urge to run away.. Run away from everything that doesn't seems to be right but that's not me.. I am not like this.. Have I become a coward? Have I not learn how to handle things? I'm confused. I don't think I can ever trust this guy again.. Especially when I had so much trust in him and yet he did this to me.. Aren't you suppose to tell your girlfriend everything? Especially after three years together? I thought we got nothing to hide from each other anymore, but no.. He has changed.. I was really so looking forward to monday!! I really don't think I deserve this at all!! Millions of needles are piercing through my heart right now.. Why do I get hurt so easily..? I am not that fragile.. Bastard.